It is a tale, told by an idiot. full of sounds &fury. signifying nothing-

l looked at my ceiling, in the darkness. My vision were blurry. All were looking shadowy with no ends, same like the amount of emptiness i have in my heart, the split&the broken which leads to nothing. Today is the 10th of nothing. But it means something to me as it marked the increasing level of my consciousness& how i suddenly realised that life is waiting for me to walk with my eyes wide open to look around the world, smiling and greet "hello life, are we good?". I deserve to be happy. All this while i am busy finding happiness which i try to create&resync like a role play. Trying to put so much effort until i realised i am not happy myself and i cried almost the 90% my life that passing by by trying so much & hoping so much more, and suddenly realised i am almost 26 in the near half of 2014. "Happiness comes the most when ure busy but not with rushed"-It comes naturally when you are ready, mentally to accept. U cannot draw happiness. U must feel it. Happiness is a desire. I cannot waste my time chasing for happiness when it was not there, or even try to push harder when really i know there isn't any answers. I am the root to be happy. I am today, realising that i have to live my life again, not by depending on others, but my own way to value the happiness that have no boundaries. Tears n laugh. I'm back, farina is back;trying to be me,the happy go lucky like i was before, where tears was really not my bestfriend-

only GOD knew why~

A question & an answer to paint-

Regards to my previous post, I am painting again. Yes I think I should. Doing a small
study on the ism I should choose. I'm thinking it might be dramatic. As prev expressionism that I always preferred.

My current life. You, and Me ~

○Message
●Style
○Composition
What else they need?

..
Starting progress````

Only GOD knew why~

what a morning blues -_-'

Only GOD knew why~

Well you only miss the light when its burning low only miss the sun when its starts to snow.

Only know ur lover when u let her go.

Like seriously annoying this woman.
Its not starting yet but already showing her true colours

&now only know uve been high when ur feeling low

..

.

Only GOD knew why~

Kita sering merasa selesa pada keterbiasaan,

Dan apabila satu hari keterbiasaan itu hilang,

Kita merasa dangkal maka pula tidak

menghadapi hari dgn kelangsungan.

Berharap keterbiasaan yg terpengaruhi dtg menyelamatkan jiwa?

Terus melangkah..tenang..jiwa terang

Pasti senang!

Only GOD knew why~

Just mumbling ~

Sounds old fashioned, I'm typing this again. Its been a while fellas, its 5:03am in the morning, I'm wide awake, being a multitasking me again. Reading, listening music, folding that mountain of clothes and sometimes taking my own break sipping a light tea. It's nothing really, just I feel like spilling my words here again- life is now challenging. I am working as a banker(basically a customer service in so called-call centre) at the foreign Malaysian bank which highly to develop my patience towards various of people demand. It was challenging, really, and its far away from what I studied before, but unconsciously provide me an art of understanding human characteristics which giving me ideas in producing work of art. Ya really, I am painting again this October. Its been so long~ and my skills were faded by time. I have now 2 sisters staying with me. And I have to move from one place to another due to room mate moving out and so and so. My car was just out from workshop due to accident. My road tax expired. What's more? I hope by any chances the barriers will not weaken my spirits towards this life journey:'). Another random talk, I accidentally found my other half blog tonight, so I was like okay pffttt he never mentioned about this when I told him I used to have this blog active. My impression was aw yeah his blog were cool even though it was last posted on 2008 i think so. Aha. He used to be a random thoughts blogger just like me ; ). As Final distance song by Utada Hikaru stops I will be publishing this post. Goodnight beautiful & handsome. Sleepwell ☆

Only GOD knew why~

just another ordinary day

Been on a fights. How can i lie with my heart?those days and these days.

I totally cannot choose one.Disaster!

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not in mood

I felt really sad these days. Felt lije wanna go back kampong. I hate all d ppl here. I miss my mom n siblings. Theres only a family who willing to understand, kept acceptin u d way u are, even d weakest n worst person u are. I wanna leave all tis shit. I really wanna go back home

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move on to a new environment

Nitenite.i am movin to a new workin place at sri petaling on monday.will be stayin home at bangi after tis.so i guess frens bcame more or less left. Nvm i hope u all pray d new envi will fit me.love<3

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Belajar!

Belajar mjd manusia yg organized~ buat jadual!!
hahaha
sO here goes~~

ni semua buat pakai paint. conteng tgn. Sbb nye the needs to have the schedule wuz so high.
Fightin! Off to work! Byeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee


Only GOD knew why~

Terlalu byk permintaan

Aku nak cpt siap keje tp aku lyn bende ni

Aku nak cpt habis assesment sbb aku da mls nk pk!

Aku nak duit, lately broke nak mati

Aku lapar, aku nak makan (mee goreng ade x kol 4pg?)

Aku nak blk umah (cuti tp xleh balik sbb byk keje!!:'( )

Aku nak kawan satu kepala, sbb mcm xde org phm aku( tgk jamni sape ade seblah aku? hantu je , tu sbb becakap ngn skrin nh)

Aku nak friend indeed sbb sume mcm chipsmore~

Aku nak mak aku

Aku nak sambal ikan bilis petai panas-panas( hahahaha)

Aku nak kereta!

Aku nak gaji woi!

Aku nak allowance

Aku nak org replace aku tuk 3 bln kat baiduri nh, xmuncul2 lg!

Aku nak tutti frutti, sangat2

Aku nak gi tandas

Plg serius,

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

Aku nak berubah

Sadarkan aku : )

Only GOD knew why~

I just dont get it

This sec, still cannot sleep. Melayan perasaan sendiri yang meroyan cm haram. U think i am blind? I cannot see u there, online? How dare u do this to me.Act like u dont see, u stone heart! I know im nothing to you. But....ok! no reason. Just why my mind keep reminding me about you dammit! Sighhh~~ i still have a lot of work to do, even this hours, but ur image disturbed my focus +_+, n i stopped doing my tons of working design! Please go away, images.you. I am sick of u that act like don't care. What else i can say? I just talking to myself. Because nobody can solve this unfinished probs. Huh

Only GOD knew why~

I love this song very much!

because i dont know why


i just love the melody
 : )






Only GOD knew why~

Fighting!

Haluhalu. Harini mcm xnk tido sbb rindu zmn xtdo time study dulu:P. Alhamdulillah, life is getting tougher nowadays. Selepas bergraduasi,tepakse(ikhlas)menjalani idop sbg seorang pekerja dan bukan petido atau pelepak atau pengkid(ttp xnk penganggur) . To be able to be multitask designer (chewah), aku sanggup terima offer footwear design dan bekerja tanpa gaji walaupun broke xhengat selama 10bln tanpa dibayar ttp dibayar yuran kursus itu sbyk 20k! Lg xsmpi seminggu final project n lepastu beram dr Shah Alam to Sri petaling for the practical at the factory. Time n tides waits fr no men! I love the challenge and i hope to anywhom read this, pray for me ya! Mane tau rezki kt sini, aminn. To be continued........

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long time no see

I miss blogging. But i dun have much time to do so. Will starting to write again soon!:)

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The words cannot describe!!

O Allah feel like crying!

The words cannot describe, to express the extremely happiness built in my heart and how im so thankful, praised, U always giv me all this rewards...Alhamdulillah..after all the hardwork..the strength, to not to giv up 4 every obstacles ive been thru..U give me the BEST!! Thank u ALLAH...Thanks to all of u who supported me all this while...Ive grown up! Im strong! This finally giv me a strongest confidence ever for my next step in life!! Alhamdulillah :D

Only GOD knew why~

People.

Come and Goes

Only the best remains

The scars stay

currently listening KEANE

Some how their songs tell the truth

"We might as well be strangers"

The fact that 

"Everybody's changing"

U are not hoping for the last man on earth

to persuasively be according to ur faith

Deym it

People really change!

One time u cud see ppl like dis..but unfortunately 

possibly a month will change the person not like u know before

So stop hoping and thinking u knoe sumone best!

Cus ure only hoping 4 a mad grasshopper!

Only GOD knew why~

4:11am at d studio

Currently listening to Tegar Rossa,
missing sumone
Suddenly remembering..
lusa deg show.
Aku mesti kuat
: )


p/s: I did it 4 good

Only GOD knew why~

. .

Only GOD knew why~

Its not easy as said to be.

Alienated.


Its not easy to be appreciated.


Its true ppl once said
" ur level of knowledge will determined how ppl will respect u"


Earlier o later. 


I hope i can do it


Striving more



Only GOD knew why~