Thursday, April 10, 2014

It is a tale, told by an idiot. full of sounds &fury. signifying nothing-

l looked at my ceiling, in the darkness. My vision were blurry. All were looking shadowy with no ends, same like the amount of emptiness i have in my heart, the split&the broken which leads to nothing. Today is the 10th of nothing. But it means something to me as it marked the increasing level of my consciousness& how i suddenly realised that life is waiting for me to walk with my eyes wide open to look around the world, smiling and greet "hello life, are we good?". I deserve to be happy. All this while i am busy finding happiness which i try to create&resync like a role play. Trying to put so much effort until i realised i am not happy myself and i cried almost the 90% my life that passing by by trying so much & hoping so much more, and suddenly realised i am almost 26 in the near half of 2014. "Happiness comes the most when ure busy but not with rushed"-It comes naturally when you are ready, mentally to accept. U cannot draw happiness. U must feel it. Happiness is a desire. I cannot waste my time chasing for happiness when it was not there, or even try to push harder when really i know there isn't any answers. I am the root to be happy. I am today, realising that i have to live my life again, not by depending on others, but my own way to value the happiness that have no boundaries. Tears n laugh. I'm back, farina is back;trying to be me,the happy go lucky like i was before, where tears was really not my bestfriend-

only GOD knew why~

Monday, October 21, 2013

A question & an answer to paint-

Regards to my previous post, I am painting again. Yes I think I should. Doing a small
study on the ism I should choose. I'm thinking it might be dramatic. As prev expressionism that I always preferred.

My current life. You, and Me ~

What else they need?

Starting progress````

Only GOD knew why~

Sunday, October 20, 2013

Tuesday, October 8, 2013

Well you only miss the light when its burning low only miss the sun when its starts to snow.

Only know ur lover when u let her go.

Like seriously annoying this woman.
Its not starting yet but already showing her true colours

&now only know uve been high when ur feeling low



Only GOD knew why~

Thursday, October 3, 2013

Kita sering merasa selesa pada keterbiasaan,
Dan apabila satu hari keterbiasaan itu hilang,
Kita merasa dangkal maka pula tidak
menghadapi hari dgn kelangsungan.
Berharap keterbiasaan yg terpengaruhi dtg menyelamatkan jiwa?
Terus melangkah..tenang..jiwa terang
Pasti senang!

Only GOD knew why~

Monday, September 30, 2013

Just mumbling ~

Sounds old fashioned, I'm typing this again. Its been a while fellas, its 5:03am in the morning, I'm wide awake, being a multitasking me again. Reading, listening music, folding that mountain of clothes and sometimes taking my own break sipping a light tea. It's nothing really, just I feel like spilling my words here again- life is now challenging. I am working as a banker(basically a customer service in so called-call centre) at the foreign Malaysian bank which highly to develop my patience towards various of people demand. It was challenging, really, and its far away from what I studied before, but unconsciously provide me an art of understanding human characteristics which giving me ideas in producing work of art. Ya really, I am painting again this October. Its been so long~ and my skills were faded by time. I have now 2 sisters staying with me. And I have to move from one place to another due to room mate moving out and so and so. My car was just out from workshop due to accident. My road tax expired. What's more? I hope by any chances the barriers will not weaken my spirits towards this life journey:'). Another random talk, I accidentally found my other half blog tonight, so I was like okay pffttt he never mentioned about this when I told him I used to have this blog active. My impression was aw yeah his blog were cool even though it was last posted on 2008 i think so. Aha. He used to be a random thoughts blogger just like me ; ). As Final distance song by Utada Hikaru stops I will be publishing this post. Goodnight beautiful & handsome. Sleepwell ☆

Only GOD knew why~

Sunday, December 18, 2011

just another ordinary day

Been on a fights. How can i lie with my heart?those days and these days.

I totally cannot choose one.Disaster!

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